i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
