called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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