I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
whose parrot is this?
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Randomize
