there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Randomize