Taylor Swift is so right about you.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
