Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
