yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
