What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
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