you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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