Porn is love you can see.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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