I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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