I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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