we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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