her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
