he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
