...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
