I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize