Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
