when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
