just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
