I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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