The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
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