I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
