And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
You left your underwear on the fireplace
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Of course I have a pirate flag
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
