it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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