Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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