He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
