There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
did you just send me my own nude
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
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