at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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