Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Come share oat with me in your robe
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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