Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
