talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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