If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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