those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
