I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
