You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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