its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
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