I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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