I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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