idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
