I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
