I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
