3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
