remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
