a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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