i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
