Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
