My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
