Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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