Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
