I love black thongs
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
