Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i love accidental penises.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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