so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
A bitchslap is in order.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
